NO CUTS!

The infamous policy highlighted by the present of a katana to  Miramax is said to have originated from Studio Ghibli’s previous experience with Warriors of the Wind, the first English dub of Nausicaa of the Valley of Wind.  The common belief is that the movie was so butchered that it demanded this response.  But just how bad is it?

The movie starts off with some narration about 1000 years passing since the Seven Days of Fire that killed half of civilization and gave rise to the Toxic Jungle.  So far, so good.  The only changes so far seem to be that Nausicaa is renamed Princess Zandra, and Ohmu, the giant beasts of the forest, are renamed Gorgons.

Oh, and the entirety of the BEAUTIFUL opening credits is completely cut out.  Yeah, the murals, the music, and the imagery of the Seven Days of Fire and the giants?  All gone.  Well, okay… not ALL of the music.  Just a bit.

Watch the following video up to 2:30 and you might understand just how great of a sin it is to cut it.

A couple minutes of Nausicaa testing the material of a giant Ohm shell, extracting its eyeshell, and playfully listening to sounds and looking at spores is cut because THIS IS AMERICA, AND WE NEED ACTION!

After taking some samples from the forest, Zandra hears gunshots and sees Lord Yupa (who retains his original name… I assume because he hired a lawyer) fleeing from a giant Gorgon.

Yupa is given a fairly decent voice who does his damnedest to say EVERYTHING in the most dramatic way possible.  It’s pretty hilarious.  The Disney dub rectifies this by recasting Yupa with… Patrick Stewart?  Huh.  Okay then.

It’s about at this point that I decide to watch Warriors of the Wind side by side with Nausicaa.

The script is for the most part fairly accurate, though it does add a lot of unnecessary chatter and makes some VERY cheesy dialogue changes.

Back to the story.

Zandra (or, as Yupa sometimes calls her, Sandra) tells Yupa that her father, King Jihl, is dying (as opposed to ill from the jungle’s toxins).

A couple minutes of chatter with the villagers and beautiful scenery is cut.

We learn that Yupa is chasing after a mythological figure clad in blue who will restore the connection between humans and the world.  The words are a bit different, but it comes across well enough.

That night, Zandra thinks to herself, and Nausicaa’s “I want to do something to help Yupa” is somehow transformed into “What is my destiny?  Is it to travel the world like Yupa?”

A Tolmekian airship crashes in the valley, and Zandra moves in to rescue anyone who might have survived.  She finds Princess Listel (Lastel), who begs that the cargo be destroyed, then dies.  In the original, Mito wonders what the princess of Pejite was doing on a Tolmekian ship.  In Warriors of the Wind, Axel determines the Tolmekians must have captured the princess of Placita her during a raid.  Mito needs to take some detective lessons from Axel.

The people of the valley get to work burning spores from the wreckage, then happen upon the cargo.  It seems to be from a Fire Demon (Warrior Giant), one of the weapons responsible for the Seven Days of Fire.

In seemingly no time, more Tolmekian ships arrive and raid the town, making a beeline for the valley’s king and killing him for no apparent reason.  This pisses Zandra off, and causes her to make the most annoying noises possible.

Up until that scene, I actually liked Zandra’s voice.  I liked it better than Alison Lohman’s depressingly lifeless Nausicaa.

Yupa (or Yuppa, as he is pronounced half the time) puts an end to the fight, as there is no way the small kingdom can successfully fend off the Tolmekians.  The leader of the Tolmekian army reveals herself to be Queen Salena (Princess Kushana… because Americans are smart enough to know princesses = good, queens = bad, silly Japs).  Also, he calls the Tolmekian airship a “spaceship.”  Are we to believe that instead of different countries, it’s planets?

Queen Salena says they are here to liberate the valley of the Toxic Jungle’s threat once and for all.  The people of the valley find that highly unlikely.  Then it’s revealed that the king was killed and the people are ready to revolt, but Zandra orders them to just let the Tolmekians do as they please in the name of peace.

An important scene of about 5 minutes is cut.  Yupa finds that Nausicaa has been keeping plants from the Toxic Jungle in a hidden chamber.  Nausicaa talks about how she discovered the plants aren’t really poisonous; it’s the water and soil of the jungle that is.  She then expresses her regret that her rage made her kill.  Because this is America, and we can’t teach our children to be peace-loving pussies.

Zandra boards a Tolmekian ship as their hostage.  During the flight, a lone gunship pilot attacks.  Strangely, Warriors of the Wind cuts out a LOT of chatter and screams.  Normally, they would add that crap in.  I guess since the Tolmekians are the villains, their screams were edited out so we wouldn’t feel bad for them.

Zandra manages to escape to a gunship and rescues Axel and Queen Salena, then helps a falling barge land safely in the Toxic Jungle.

There’s a scene where Queen Salena tries to keep control of the situation at gunpoint.  Nausicaa asks what Kushana is so afraid of that she has to point that gun around, while Zandra says to Salena, “I don’t think you’re as evil as you pretend to be.”  I… I don’t even…

A Gorgon shows up and Zandra convinces them to leave peacefully.  We lose a good minute and a half of peaceful imagery, and we completely skip over Nausicaa learning, apparently psychically, that the pilot from before is still alive in the jungle.  So Zandra leaves the group for no apparent reason and just happens to bump into the pilot, I guess.

We lose about four minutes of Nausicaa’s dream about her saving a baby Ohmu and villagers being shocked about her.

The pilot is Prince Milo (Asbel).

Warriors of the Wind inserts some internal monologue where Zandra comments on the irony of trying to save Listel, being attacked by Milo, saving Milo, and being saved by Milo.  In the original, Nausicaa doesn’t really give Asbel a second thought and goes “oh, a tree!”

We lose about five minutes of Nausicaa embracing nature, then talking to Asbel and telling him his sister’s dead.  Then the two try to repair her glider, talk about the jungle, and sleep.

So, the Tolmekians are trying revive a Fire Demon, a report comes about the airship attack, but the Queen’s second-in-command don’t care.

Salena explains to the valley “hostages” that the Fire Demon egg the Tolmekians have was actually taken from Placita.  Yeah, turns out THE PLACITANS had the highly dangerous superweapon and the Tolmekians took it away for fear Placita would attack Tolmekia with it.  Salena also reveals she hates the Toxic Jungle because a giant gorgon tore her hand off, and to her it doesn’t matter who controls the Fire Demon, as long as the Toxic Jungle is destroyed.  A little rough here and there, but up to now the translation gets the gist of things across.  Here’s where it goes overboard: Salena tells them that they can use the Fire Demon to rule the world.  You came SO close to getting this scene right, and you just have to go and add that little extra spice of cartoonish villainy.

We lose about four minutes of the villagers in the valley burning some toxic spores and realizing they already spread their corruption through their trees.

Zandra and Milo arrive in Placita and discover the insects from the Toxic Jungle have already overrun the capital.  Some survivors land nearby, and they talk about their plan to attack the Tolmekians in the Valley of Wind.

Now here’s where I have to explain a major fuck-up.  When Milo and Zandra see the Gorgon in the center of the town, Milo feels like he’s been defeated and says it doesn’t matter now; even if they kill every Tolmekian soldier, his country has already been devastated.  Zandra tells him not to give up.  Sounds okay, right?

In the Japanese version, Asbel says that even if they managed to drive away the Tolmekian army, the cost was too great.  Nausicaa asks why he said that.  They meet up with the survivors, and they explain their plan to attack the Tolmekians at the valley: use lures to draw Toxic Jungle insects to the valley, and the insects will wipe everyone out.  This is a doubly horrific revelation, because Nausicaa learns the destruction of Pejite was, effectively, CAUSED BY ITS OWN PEOPLE.

So, while Zandra is horrified about the disaster to come to her valley, Nausicaa is horrified that WAR MAKES PEOPLE DO SOME FUCKING HORRIFIC THINGS.

Then we have Zandra call them cowards and basically the same as the Tolmekians, but completely skip over Nausicaa saying they can’t destroy the Toxic Forest because it’s responsible for purifying the valley’s water sources.  So basically, Warriors of the Wind completely downplays anything to do with the environment.

Anyway, Zandra and Milo get knocked out and captured since they might warn the valley about their plan.  Queen Salena manages to make her way to the valley and joins up with her army, who is currently fighting off the valley villagers.

Placita’s queen helps Zandra escape.  Meanwhile, the airship is being attacked by a Tolmekian airship.  It’s a pretty great scene, and once again, Warriors of the Wind cuts half a minute of people being friendly to Nausicaa.  Really don’t know why villagers being friendly is such a terrible thing.  I can’t even make a joke about it.  It’s just bizarre.

Yupa lands on one of the airships and fights his way through.  Hilariously, you can hear one of the soldiers very clearly say “kisamaaaaa!”

We lose about 4 minutes of Kushana talking about wanting to get to know Nausicaa better, the valley villagers trying to explain that burning the entire jungle would be disastrous, and the wind ominously stopping for the first time in ages.

Zandra flies toward the valley and spots a massive herd of Gorgons traveling towards a light in the distance.  They move in closer and learn that it’s the bait.  What’s the bait?  A WOUNDED BABY GORGON.  Zandra and Axel are finally horrified about the right thing for once.  Zandra stays behind to try to turn the Gorgons around while Axel continues on to warn everyone of the coming stampede.  While everyone flees for higher ground, Salena orders the awakening of the Fire Demon.  And here’s where I bash my head again.  In the original, Kushana is told it’s too soon.  She replies with “if not now, then when?”  In Warriors of the Wind, Salena replies with “It’s never too soon to rule the world!”  I….. GAAAAAAAH, FUCKING DAMMIT, WHY?!  Why the FUCK do you keep sprinkling in these absurd lines about ruling the world?!

Zandra flies to the bait (which is being towed by what appears to be a floating pot…) and gets shot a few times before knocking it down.

Time for another comparison.  Zandra sees the stampeding Gorgons and thinks “if I don’t stop them, they’ll destroy the valley.”  NO SHIT.  In the original, Nausicaa notices they haven’t stopped even though the bait is no longer leading them, so they “must be blind with rage,” and she needs to think of another way to calm them.

She rescues the baby Gorgon, picks up a gatling gun, and threatens the pilots to turn back and return the baby to the Gorgons, because you can make all the changes you want, but you have to keep it in that NAUSICAA IS BADASS.

Meanwhile, Salena has revived the Fire Demon.  But it’s too early, and after a few nuclear blasts, the Demon just falls apart and dies.

Zandra gives the baby back, gets knocked off, dies, calms the Gorgons, and somehow gets resurrected by the Gorgons.  Zandra’s clothing, now covered in blue Gorgon blood, evokes the image of the legendary warrior from the tapestry way back in the beginning.

So a crisis has been averted, everyone’s happy, and… the end.

Oh, go back to that first Youtube video and watch the rest, because the ending credits were completely cut out.  I mean, there are ending credits, but the animation is gone.  It’s just white text on blackness.

To be fair, the Japanese ending also kinda lacks any true finality to the story.  We don’t get the feeling that everything’s going to be just fine between the Pejites and Tolmekian, nor do we get the feeling Kushana has gained an appreciation for the forest.  But hey, it’s a good enough ending.

Do read the manga though.  It’s sooooo much better than the anime and definitely in the top 5 best all-time manga.

Accuracy: 3
It gets the gist of the movie across, and despite the name changes here and there, there aren’t any major deviations from the original.  Deviations, no.  Omissions?  A shitload.  One of the major themes of the original was completely lost.  Truly a sin.  But overall, it’s accurate enough.  The content, that is.  Now, the VHS cover…

Let’s look over this very carefully.  Let’s start at the top-left.  That’s a fucking pegasus.  There’s a LOT of weird stuff in this movie, but no pegasus.  Now the center-left warrior.  Who the fuck is that supposed to be?  It’s a freaking robot wearing a blue robe, and he has a laser-arm.  I can’t even think of a proper composite to explain how that came about.  Blue robe = the legendary warrior.  Okay.  Mechanical parts… uh… Queen Salena has an artifical arm?  But she’s a bad guy…  I dunno!  The center hero… who’s that?  Is it supposed to be Zandra?  But the blue-clad girl on a glider in the top-right is clearly Zandra.  So… is it supposed to be Milo?  Why would he be center when the main character is CLEARLY Zandra?  And the right hero… it looks like a tiny Fire Demon wielding a sword.  But then what are they riding on?  They’re not riding on a glider, that’s for sure.  It could be a Gorgon, but the mouth looks too much like the Fire Demon’s.  So is that a small Fire Demon riding a large Fire Demon?  Finally, “A band of young warriors on the wings of their greatest challenge!”  There’s like a total of two named young people in the film, and only Zandra could be considered anywhere close to a warrior.  Yupa is the baddest fighter in the entire film, and he’s not what you would call young.  The only other young person of importance in the cast is Milo, and he’s not “of the wind,” since he’s from Placita, and it’s not like we can use “of the wind” in a more general term that can mean something more than just the valley of the wind, since we decided to cut the scene where the wind stops blowing, thus trivializing the role of the wind.

tl;dr, this movie suffered from critical American marketing failure.  And fuck those guys.

Pleasure Rating: Must’ve Been High
Good gawd… Most of it was okay, but the changes… oh gawd, the changes… It was so depressing and head-bashingly bad…

Rewatchability: 1

Music: Joe Hisaishi

Marketability: I kinda want a figure of whatever that robed robot is supposed to be.

Nausicaa wasn’t one of my favorite Hayao Miyazaki films to begin with (my favorite is and always will be Princess Mononoke), but I do have great respect for it (mainly for the manga), and it’s a damn shame what… er… who’s responsible for this mess?

Okay, so Wikipedia puts the blame squarely on New World Pictures.  At this point, I’m willing to blame everyone who had their names on it, so that also means R&G Video and StarMaker.  Fuck ALL of you guys.

That all said, it wasn’t really the butchering one would expect from its reputation.  A majority of the plot was left intact, and while central themes were downplayed, the movie certainly wasn’t censored.  Hell, this is probably the only case I know of where removing footage from the original resulted in… kinda the opposite of censorship.  It made the movie less soft and friendly.  Hell, I think it’s appropriate to say the intention was to make it… edgier.  And no, that’s not a compliment.  It was fucking terrible.  But it could have been worse.  Much, much worse.  Is Warriors of the Wind a butchering of the original?  I don’t know if I would go that far.  Did it make a beautiful thing ugly?  Fuck yeah.